@ShashaSelflove 11/05/15 The Giver


You are that person, the one that so many come to for help, guidance,  love, compassion, empathy and confession. 

There are those of us that find great joy in being “the giver” maybe because there is satisfaction in knowing that you have the ability to help someone or perhaps you are able to share your wisdom after all of the hardship you have experienced first hand. You give of your knowledge and are thankful for your experience because when you give you have a sense of preventing them from having to suffer what you have. As fruitful as the giver may be, there are two responsibilities to be taken into account. The giver must remember to give themselves self care and the receiver must not always be the constant beneficiary. 

Self care is vital to all of us and there is no guilt in taking some time to tend to your own wounds. When you have enough of them, you learn to ignore the pain and blaze on, but that can leave some nasty scars. Tend to yourself, sleep in an extra hour, get that super mango avocado clay mask at the spa, or better yet – give yourself some time without giving.  Allow yourself to receive,  surprise someone when you inform them that you feel challenged. Take stock of who you are surrounded by, don’t trick yourself into thinking that you are always the one that has to step up to the plate every time those people are in trouble.  Because then you go from assisting people to enabling them, and that isn’t helping them at all.

Give importance to those that are joyfully around you because they value the person that you are and what you have to offer, even if they never come to you for help, they value the fact that if they ever asked – you would be there for them. They aren’t maintaining a relationship with you because they want from you, they respect you. Part of self care is making sure that those that surround you care for you as well.

Being a giver is a careful balance of giving and receiving. Acknowledging that if you fail to keep a healthy balance you will become exhausted and no longer be able to share your gift with anyone. Bring yourself back to center, meditate,  get comfortable with receiving, allow for some quiet time and I send a Big Hug!

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16 thoughts on “@ShashaSelflove 11/05/15 The Giver

  1. I came across this post on the right day, at the right time. I just took my first full day of self care in 6 months. My daughter went to Nana’s for the day. I spent mine reading and writing at a coffee shop, a lovely way to spend a rainy afternoon. My nose in a book and a fresh brewed iced tea in my hands. Wonderfully liberating. I feel rejuvenated and spirited once again. Self care is so important and something I feel we abandon too easily and too often.

    1. Wonderful! I am so happy for you and make this a practice, we are much to often occupied with everything and don’t take time for ourselves. There is no guilt, no bad guy in this equation, just powering the batteries so we can keep going. Well done and thank you for the comment!

    1. Yessssss! It doesn’t even have to be something huge, it can be something as simple as going for a long walk or grabbing some tea, those of us that find joy in giving must also find joy in giving to ourselves. Thank you for all the amazing work you do and for the comment!

  2. Self care is an art of finding time for one’s self in the untimely schedules. Suggesting, boosting, helping and spreading smiles though my soul cries inside is habited. Finding my happiness in their smile has now become my greatest addiction. All I can do by taking some time for myself is to find someone new to help more…😂

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