Photo Credit: My Phone
You let it slip out of your mouth, “I miss you” words that come from deep within – the knowing that you have stayed up late staring into the ceiling longing for them to be by your side. You have thought of them while walking down the street and as you smile with the memory of them you realize you look crazy, smiling and walking on the sidewalk and alone, you also realize that the empty, “I miss you too”, are just words in an vacant polite reply. They see your longing, wanting to have more – but they don’t feel the same and don’t know how or don’t want to let you down.
Every time you walk away from them your heart races and instead of them helping fill the void – there is a sense that they are helping make the void bigger. They are taking for granted that you have sacrificed some pride in return for a tiny morsel of their attention.
Why are you making yourself available to someone that doesn’t care if you are available to them? They don’t value your gift, the offer of love and devotion that you have set aside for them, but yet you are still there, gift in hand and the door firmly slammed in your face. You won’t be responded to the way you deserve, deep down inside you may already know that but on the surface you want to deny the harsh truth. They don’t want you, they aren’t perfect for you, they are prefect to someone else. You are as well.
You are worthy of someone that sees your gifts even when you are hiding them. You are worthy of honest love and friendship. You are worthy of someone being the one saying, “I miss you”, first. Don’t confuse living a positive life in living a life of “someday”, “some day they will change or come around”, no – living a positive life is one based in reality. Stop making fantasies for the future and start being honest with yourself today. In very few instances do those that don’t value you all of a sudden have an epiphany about who you are and what you are worth. Move on, keep forward in your journey and accept the lesson they have given you – which if you haven’t noticed is to place yourself in a place of value. If you don’t, you will not only continue to be around people who don’t notice you but you will lose yourself so much that you will look in the mirror and say, “I miss you”.
Don’t lose yourself in false hope, we want the connection so bad that we attempt to see it even when it is clear that it isn’t there. Stop wincing your eyes, don’t adjust your glasses – although you may be seeking their emotional investment in you, they aren’t seeking the same.
Easy to say, hard to do, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. But we are talking about self love, so brace yourself. You can do this…Big hug!
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