What you have in front of you isn’t your only option. It feels that way, because you’ve been looking at the view with hopes and dreams through just one window. Raise your gaze and find another place to fall.
Sometimes you simply have to look in a different direction. It’s not so much that you made a mistake, it is that you put your hope in the wrong place. That’s all, and that’s okay – I give you permission to forgive yourself. I’m in the process I’m forgiving myself as well.
We look to certain people in our life they are along the path we bump into them or trip over them or they grab on, or something in us appeals to them and obviously something about them appeals to us. Instead of walking by, we stop and give them attention we share our story hoping that our individual story is no longer individual. But we soon find out, we get little clues – they show you who they really are and that you were never going to be a part of their story, although they somehow become a part of yours. They told you they didn’t want anything from you but they did take, they told you they weren’t there to hurt you but your pain is very real, they told you that is was of mutual benefit but somehow you are empty handed.
My only advice, the only thing that I can say is that you have to find another place fall. You have to take back your hope and you have to recover your love. As you hold on to it, that same hope will push you forward and give you the energy and the will to think but there’s someone else out there will love you. You will have the bravery to know that there is someone that respect you and value your hope. I would have the audacity to say that they also hope for you, they are waiting for you to come in their life.
Be honest with yourself, more than anyone else and know that this was a learning opportunity for your heart not to flutter so freely. You can love without restriction, it is who you love that is the tricky part.
Find another person, place, thing to comfort yourself with – but let me say this also, you are enough. You can comfort yourself, you can be your biggest supporter and you have to love yourself enough to build yourself back up from whatever attempted to destroy you. Granted, it won’t be easy – I am not writing this from a place of fairytale but from a place of experience. I am living this and nothing feels better than liberating yourself from something that you looked up to and was holding you under it.
Draw strength from you frustration, get pissed off about your goals – all of them! Your love goals, your life goals, your health goals and your secret goals. You don’t have to share them – I just want you to accomplish them! Shake off the dark cloud that hangs over you, turn your face towards the sun even as it continues to rain. Let the water wash away the doubts you have about your abilities and realize that your plans may have been interrupted by this temporary visitor – but your plans were never cancelled! Along with the rain let your tears flow down the drain as well, a little detox is good every now and again. Don’t allow this experience to make you bitter or scorn. You have to continue to seek out the positive, it is hard because so much negativity is thrown at us every day – the key is to not absorb it, just realize that it is coming at you and why. Go with your eyes open, a clear head and your heart in your back pocket and find another (good, positive, loving) place to fall. Big Hug!
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