@ShashaSelflove 8/02/16 Abandoned


Photo: Makenna Alyse, Pinterest

We have varying degrees of closeness to certain people in our lives, from casual to intense our attachments begin to have significance as they start to have worth to you. Maintenance is necessary with these bonds, you want them to flourish and thrive because they mean so much to you. But what happens when that person that you have invested so much into no longer wants to be part of your story? It is a pain that crushes your hopes, it blinds your ability to see the future without them and it seems like there is no clear reason why this is happening.

There is a lesson to be learned here, regardless of how little time you spent with this person there is something to take away from the experience. There are no accidental encounters, no empty interactions – only opportunities to grow. One day you will decide to invest into someone new that comes into your life (friend or partner), you will have learned how to restrain the way you give of yourself. Sounds negative but in truth there are those of us that continuously get left empty handed, having given of ourselves and loved without measure. But why not learn to love with our heads and then let this new person earn your heart? Even if it is just a friend, don’t you have to obligation to yourself to protect your heart? Self love isn’t about being selfish, it is about self preservation and your heart is definitely in need of protection.  So much in life is designed to hurt but sometimes we are hurt by situations that we could have seen coming. There is no regretting a lesson, there is applying it to your experience so that you can have a healthier outcome the next time around and you have to be thankful for the lecture.

The force that pushes you in the direction of sharing what you have accumulated is gratitude. Gratitude that you survived the experience and now are wiser for it, yes while you were learning it was grueling but every experience serves a purpose in your life. It is not getting to where you are going that will be the marker of something accomplished, it is how you got there. Along the way you will receive so much – love, lessons, advice, experiences and pain. You carry all of that with you and the point isn’t to hoard it and allow it to sink into negative space in your mind, the point is to put it to use. The byproducts of your journey are for your edification and for the edification of those around you, how and when you dispense this is really up to you.

You are not abandoned, although the pain of the moment seems that way. It is no longer their time in our life, they may come back at another time. There are details that they need to work on as well, maybe to become a better person in your life or not. Let the split in your journeys happen so you can progress in your path and become better people for the experience – if you are meant to meet up further down the road, you will. Here’s empathizing, Big Hug!

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