I am pissed off. I’m exhausted. The blood that courses through my veins feels like shards of glass scraping along the inside of my skin. I don’t writhe in pain, but I steam in impatience. When am I going to get a break? Everyone seems to be getting their turn – their sigh of relief – except me. I carry my weary self around, looking for an empty seat to collapse in, but there are none available. Some chairs are broken, while others are occupied by those who appear well rested. And some of these people are occupying one seat, while using another to rest their legs. And my pace is slowing as I try to walk past them, and with my back straightened, even though my feet are giving out beneath me. All this fatigue is just making me angry, and no other emotion seems available. How do I push through when my arms are this weak? I no longer have it in me. How do I stay positive when everything seems to fall apart around me? Why should I even try?
The truth is: it’s in these moments when we have to try our hardest to find that silver lining, even if what we’re looking for isn’t there. I am not saying that you should lie to yourself. But try to consider that everything has a purpose, even though we may not see it at the time. Times of turbulence are the hardest times to see clearly, and we end up grasping to find that steady balance, while many around us may not be aware that we are going through something. And those that are aware may be giving us advice that does not apply to us. Even though they are trying their best, it may not be what you need to hear.
Go through your turbulence. You’ll be richer for the experience. You will find your footing, regardless of how uneven the floor feels beneath you. But don’t get stuck in the angry phase of your situation. You are allowed to go through your stages at your own pace, and without apology. But don’t linger there, because that is when we get bitter. Ride it out, and take the lessons you’ve learned with you. Greater experiences are coming your way. Big Hug!
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